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You have given me a good laugh and of course, you are totally right!!!!!
I did NOT play over the swimming pool, let me assure you!
Sometimes I feel like the person that posted they don’t do weddings anymore!
However, for the most part, weddings go pretty well and I enjoy them. It’s just these few queen bee wedding planners that have made me want to scream, lately!!!!!!
I wouldn’t know how to report a wedding planner. Many of them run their own business and there is no one to complain to. I’ll have to give that some thought, next time, however!
I had a wedding planner tell me that she was “certified” in weddings and therefore more qualified to make decisions regarding the wedding ceremony then I, the lowly harpist, or the bride who hired her for her “expertise.”
You run into some really odd people in this business.
You have to just laugh, sometimes, but I will NOT be playing my harp over a swimming pool on some plank that the wedding planner came up with just because she has “wedding credentials”!!!!! : )
rr
Wow! That’s quite the scam. Thanks for educating me.
My husband and I had $58,000 scammed from our credit card a couple of years ago.
Someone got the number, maxed it out, made a phone payment for the full amount, maxed it out, made another phone payment, etc. for several days.
By the time the bank figured out the phone payments bounced they had charged $58,000 on our card.
We got several messages from the credit card company but the people calling had such thick accents we couldn’t understand them and figured it was a scam and never called back!
It was a HUGE mess to straighten out and considered MAJOR fraud by police, etc….
Nice ideas! Thank you! You are absolutely right about a seasoned musician that can taylor music to the situation. The idea of a DJ just “clicking” when the bride is at the alter is awful, but some of the brides just don’t get that.
Thanks so much for your reply.
Robin RoysConsider yourself lucky if you’ve not had the wedding planner from hell. Many of them are nice and will just “call to touch base” and get the ceremony started on time, etc. and are great.
However, the last 2 wedding planners I encountered were “nervous nells.”
I suspect in this economy, brides are hiring “newbies” because an experienced planner wouldn’t want to waste a lot of time micromanaging a professional.
The planners called me at least 5-7x, mostly the week of the wedding, badgering me to go to the rehearsal, (which I did not) demanding a recording of the ENTIRE WEDDING MUSIC so they could rehearse to it, since I wouldn’t rehearse, telling me I had to arrive 2 hours early because she wanted EVERYTHING in place 90 minutes prior to the ceremony, trying to change the location of the harp to some far off place, because it might “block” someone’s view of the wedding party or mess up the photographs, etc…
I’ve even had one planner that wanted to attend my “home rehearsal” to verify the music was prepared, since I wouldn’t attend the actual wedding rehearsal!!!
It’s hard when they are in your face at the ceremony, telling you to move your harp some place else, and the bride is no where around.
I take pride in my professionalism, dress well, arrive early and am well prepared. An overzealous wedding planner drives me nuts!!!!
R
Good ideas. I used to do this all the time, years ago, but got kind of spoiled with the brides that hired me on line!
The wedding planners are becoming an issue lately. I think your “bobby pin” comment is perfect! I’ll have to remember that one.
I hate it when they tell me something different then the bride told me the week before. I am hired by the BRIDE, not the planner and take my instructions from her, but on the wedding day, I suppose the planner is her “voice.”
Some of these planners are nervous wrecks and drive me crazy!
Guess I’m getting old!Thanks.
RobinI completely agree. How do you nicely tell the bride this information?
I’ve thought of saying I charge $100 an hour for in home consulting, but am happy to communicate on the phone or email for no additional charge. : )
Some of the wedding planners I’ve run in to lately monopolize my time and try to micro manage every minute of my performance. It’s really frustrating.
I agree totally, if they’ve booked me.
I’m currently being asked to “audition” with my flutist for a wedding. Guess it boils down to how much I want the job.
I used to work for a religious, high end Retirement Center, as their choir director. They DO have money but don’t want to spend it on their residents. Believe me…their bottom line is money and how to MAKE it.
An honorarium is nice but the BEST way is to sell CD’s. I sold 10 cd’s for $10 each and THAT made the experience slightly better.
I’ve played the harp for 35 years and I just don’t see the “return” for reducing my rates. I’ve not gotten more gigs out of it. It’s a “nice” thing to do but a lot of work and expense for little financial return.
If you are a music TEACHER, needing a free place for your students to perform, I can see doing it at the senior center. At least you get something out of it.
Guess I’m getting cynical in my old age. Why is it okay for every other venue to make money but when it comes to music, we are asked over and over, to donate????
I agree that it is a scam, but WHAT exactly is the scam? I get this kind of email at least 2x per month. Are they just wanting a working email address??
I post my general rates (can always adjust if they take the time to call)
because I want to weed out the “I thought a harpist would be around $50” brides, who wouldn’t hire me anyway.For many years, I’ve kindly explained how my fee reflected the many years of training, expense of an instrument and transport vehicle, etc. but over the years it just seems like such a waste of my time, because those brides didn’t hire me and were either rude or attempted to get me to reduce my rate to $50.
For the most part, people that contact me now, have a general idea of my fee, so that is a time saver for me and if I really want the job, I can say I’m running a 10% discount through the end of the month.
Best wishes. Robin Roys
I always amp, too, but I’ve stopped mentioning that lately because in my area, many of the mansions are saying they have “sound level restrictions” and I get into a mess trying to explain that the harp amp is NOT going to bother the neighbors.
I end up having to speak with the management and have actually been told NOT to bring an amp on several occasions.
Now I just ask for access to an electrical outlet and quietly set up my amp and sometimes cover it with black lace. Haven’t had one complaint.
Ah, the hoops we harpists have to jump through!
Robin Roys
I would love to think no bride actually took the article to heart but I have gotten calls from brides that don’t like my rate quote and say, “Don’t you have a student that would do it cheaper?”
I’m try to be professional to these brides but sometimes I want to SCREAM, “are you insane????”
or how about hiring a student to make your dress, do your hair and make up or take your photos!!!!!!
The health dept. protects the caterers by not allowing minors in the kitchen, but musicians are vulnerable.
Best wishes.
Robin RoysI would be THRILLED if you could confront them on this issue!
GO DAVID!!!!!!
I’ve never seen an article about hiring MINOR CHILDREN (that includes high school students) to do the flowers, make the gown or do the photography!!! It is an outrageous concept!!!!
The Knot is very powerful, unfortunately. I’d say I cut my wedding business in half by dropping my advertisement with them.
Gigmasters, Wedding wire and those sites just are not generating the business The Knot did, for me.
BUT, I just couldn’t let them get away with such antics. They never replied to my complaint. Just turned it over to their business dept. and we bickered for about 2 months before they finally agreed to let me out of my contract.
I love your postings, BTW!!!!
Robin RoysDid she pull that scam on the LIMO company, I wonder? That is just down right RUDE.
I think you handled it very well.
There’s really no winning with so many of these brides that want something for nothing. Seems like they always pick on the musicians.
It’s discouraging. I see so many vendors doing unprofessional things at weddings such as decorating while guests are being seated, photographers that leave their stuff all over the place, sloppy catering and DJ’s doing sound checks while the harp is playing.
Then there’s the harpist, who CARES about their music, who purchased an expensive instrument and a vehicle, spent years studying, arrived early to tune, etc., etc….WHY short change us????
Best wishes.
Robin Roys
