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Arguing with me

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Viewing 14 posts - 1 through 14 (of 14 total)
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  • #87497

    I have a student’s mother that is very intersted in her daughter’s progression and a dedicated parent.

    #87498
    Evangeline Williams
    Participant

    Did you let her know about some companies’ rent-to-own programs?

    #87499
    diane-michaels
    Spectator

    She may just have bad consumer habits which don’t mean she’ll have bad parent habits.

    #87500
    sherry-lenox
    Participant

    My harp teacher works with kids, adults, and OLD adults (me

    #87501

    Occasionally I have had students come for lessons after they have already purchased a lacklustre instrument. We usually work with it for as long as they’re making progress, but if they are not doing well, I tell the parents that the student will practice a lot more if they enjoy the sound they are making. The problem then, is, as another thread asks: Where do the bad harps go?

    #87502
    carl-swanson
    Participant

    The parent sounds very narcisstic. This means that she is not going to listen to anything you say, AND THEN, if she gets a bad instrument, will blame you for not advising her properly. So I would suggest you go into ‘cover-your-butt ‘ mode. Put all of your advice down on paper. What you recommend, and what you don’t, and why. Tell her you’ve made this handout for your students and give her a copy. That will relieve you of any responsibility if she looses her shirt on something terrible.

    #87503
    frances-duffy
    Participant

    I had a similar problem with a student’s mother…it started with her sitting in on the lessons and questioning my teaching and ended with her attempting to purchase a harp on Ebay without consulting me.

    #87504

    Carl,

    #87505
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I have seen people repeatedly stung by buying harps on e-bay.

    #87506
    unknown-user
    Participant

    This is a tough one, so comiserations to you Calista. Well, I think everything that everyone has said is good and you have done as much as you can. Putting it into an information sheet is a good idea, and I’d just

    #87507
    rosalind-beck
    Participant

    Calista, I once had a student ask me about the wisdom of purchasing a very, very old harp she saw at an estate sale.

    #87508
    unknown-user
    Participant

    If their family budget only allows for one of the ebay rosewood harps, then you could suggest a Harpsicle in its place. You can put legs on these. :o) I can show you photos and such as i’ve had tons of fun with using these as starter harps for low-income students.

    It is common in our profession for people to have no respect for the knowledge of trained musicians. They simply consider that they know as much. We live in the age when “the customer is always right”. Give them your informed options, then let them learn the hard way as they appear to require that method. I’ve had students who bought those harps either against my advice or without ever seeking it in the first place. I feel sorry for the kids involved and so we do our best together. Sometimes the harps crack beyond usage, sometimes they last a few years. It’s a crapshoot. :oP

    #87509
    unknown-user
    Participant

    How did it resolve Calista? Hope it went well,

    Curls.

    #87510

    After trying again to explain all the reasons not to 1) rush into a purchase and 2) why “you get what you pay for”, I convinced her to hold off until I could locate her a good used one.

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