Nervousness during lessons

[kay-lister]

That reminds me of someone I used to know that was the director of the Naval Academy Choir.

[rod-c]

Donna:

I agree with all the posts here. What you are experiencing is quite normal. Maybe knowing this will help you relax a bit.

[galen-reed]

One thing I frequently find with my students is that when they have it “perfect at home” but don’t do nearly as well at the lesson, they frequently have forgotten the context.

[carl-swanson]

Kim Rowe asked me 8 years ago to write an article about preparing for a performance. Any performance: final exam, student recital, entrance audition, competition, etc. She told me she wanted to call the article THE BIG DAY. The article I wrote was published in the March/April 2002 Harp Column. You can find it by going to my company web site, http://www.swansonharp.com, and click on the ARTICLES page. It deals with all of the problems mentioned here. I’ve never heard of people getting nervous in a lesson. But the problems are the same as for any performance and the suggestions in the article should help.

[Donna O]

I want to thank everyone who took the time and energy to give me helpful suggestions and observations.

[Mira Devi]

These are great responses. I just want to add that I go through the same thing. I play perfectly at home and then everything just falls apart in front of my teacher. I go to her house for my lesson and she has a totally different harp than mine, so all my kinesthetic body memory of playing the song goes right out the window. I always play horribly on her harp and it frustrates me and amplifies my nervousness. Also, my teacher has a different communication style than me. She has been playing music all her life and is strong on “auditory communication.” I have no music background and am predominately “visual and kinesthetic.” So when she merely explains a concept verbally, I often have no idea what she’s talking about. I have had to work hard to build effective communication with her and let her know my learning style needs. I often ask her for visual demonstrations. She responds positively to this and shifts her teaching accordingly. When I understand her better, my nervousness decreases.

Another thing I noticed is that my brain just loses focus sometimes during the lesson and goes into a kind of confused “black out” that often involves disproportionate fear: Fear of making mistakes, fear of not being able to read new music fast enough, fear of not getting the rhythm right the first time: All of which is totally, totally unrealistic for me, especially during a lesson. I had to realize that I am there to learn, so if I get confused I stop and ask detailed questions, I can slow myself down, I can ask my teacher for feedback, or I can ask for a moment to regain my focus. Sometimes, I ask for a few moments to just stare at and touch this foreign harp I am not used to. That helps a lot! If my brain gets really locked up, I ask to move on to a different piece and come back to the problem piece afterwards. This is really effective for me. Remember, it is your lesson. With intention, you can begin to command how you react to yourself and you can invent new ways of coping. Being aware of the inner self-talk is also important to monitor.

I meditate before my lessons now, which totally improves my focus and calms my nervous system a lot. When I do this, I perform better and learn faster. It has been 2 years of lessons and I’m just getting to the point where I can relax more and try to have fun. I pretend my teacher is not there while I am playing the song. That seems to work well. When she does interject with critical feedback, I grow in my technique by leaps and bounds. So it is important to remember how much your playing will improve by putting yourself in the presence of the teacher. That adds to the excitement and joy of the lesson. It was important for me to shift my paradigm about the lesson: From fear to excitement of the opportunity and joy in learning.

[Alice Avery]

Hi, Donna,

I thought I was the only one with this concern/problem of

[V. B.]

Believe me we never get over being nervous.

[Anonymous]

I know this is an old post, but I was happy to read this.

[Saul Davis Zlatkovski]

The key is your preparation. If your practice has been solid, it will hold together in a lesson. If not, it will fall apart like wet tissues. It is a cry for help to your teacher, because every fault will be exposed. When you learn to deal with every angle, every problem, and with sufficient repetition to lock it in place, you will be secure. It takes time and lots of effort and lots and lots of thinking.

We tested this when I was in Tanglewood, and among the ten of us, if you had drilled thoroughly, you had to repractice at least three times before your lesson, preferably five times or more, for it to be faultless. As a rule, we found that it took at least ten correct repetitions to secure anything. Seven to get it right, and three or more times again to lock it in place. Anything less was insecure. Three times was the absolute minimum, even just to stay where you were and not lose ground. I suspect you play through pieces as you please, and only work on spots that give you trouble. (Like everyone naturally does.) That results in trouble spots that move from day to day, week to week, and nothing is secure. A castle cannot be built on shifting sand. It’s very simple if you can boil it all down clearly enough, and that’s the hard part.

[sherry-lenox]

I had a very unpleasant harp related experience a few weeks ago, and since then I’ve had the two best, most relax lessons I’ve had in years. Go figure.

[kay-lister]

Sherry – what happened?

K

[kay-lister]

Thanks for the personal

[shannon-schumann]

My personal experience corresponds to Sylvia Clark and Saul Davis Zlatkovski (although at my level, I think I need to go through something more like 500 times, instead of 5).

If I can prepare for my lesson by analyzing what I do well, and by articulating two or three goals or questions for my lessons, they are always much more helpful for me. The day before or morning of my lesson, I mentally review how the week has gone, and list the difficult spots for me – maybe it was making a certain passage sound the way I wanted, or maybe it was getting the fingering worked out in a certain section, or maybe it was something not related to my lesson, like trying to improvise in a certain style. I have always known, cognitively, that my teacher was my ally, but having questions prepared help me also know it emotionally.

HOWEVER – This is not the same as coming in with excuses for not doing well, though – for me, I have to have a problem-solving attitude, and I have to be able to know what I have done that hasn’t worked, so that we can find something that does work.

+++++++++
Sylvia Clark wrote on 5/30/10 After several years of lessons, one day my teacher spent the whole hour lesson on a 4-bar section of a piece. When I left, I finally realized that I wasn’t going to lessons to perform for my teacher. I was going there to learn how to practice. It’s sort of like a skating coach helping a student get ready for a competition (performance). After that, I felt more comfortable at lessons, thinking of them as a guide, rather than some kind of test.

Saul Davis Zlatkovski wrote on 6/11/12 The key is your preparation.

[jane]

My teacher, who’s a saint (and a harp

[Author]

Posts